EPISODES

Until his mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's, Mark Wilson was a human resources executive at Taco Bell. Doctors gave his widowed mom six years to live. Mark retired, moved back home, back to the bedroom of his childhood. And he made a plan. He drew on his corporate experience to build a caregiving team of five aides who cared for his mother 24/7. He researched how particular foods might help his mother and he took over the cooking. He searched for a doctor to help his mother with a ...

From the caregiver's mindset to making a home safe to understanding the legal side of caregiving, The Caregiver's Advocate is a collection of essays, written by and for caregivers. Debbie DeMoss Compton spearheaded "The Caregiver's Advocate," an international bestselling book featuring 21 authors from 4 countries, offering diverse perspectives and strategies for caregivers. The Caregiver's Advocate Volume 2 features 22 experts from 3 countries who share things they wish they had known sooner in...

Lance A. Slatton is a change-maker in the world of family caregiving. He has the lived experience of a caregiver, the expertise of a professional caregiving services provider, and the wisdom to recognize the power of a caregiver's personal story. His service to the community can be seen in family-owned homecare services company, Enriched Life Homecare Services. Beyond that, Slatton is the author The All Home Care Matters Official Family Caregivers Guide, and the host or co-host 4 podcasts about...

What’s it like to be the caregiver for your parents while raising a young family of your own, and your wife is pregnant? Not easy! Healthcare journalist Paul Wynn writes about caregiving issues for more than 70 national publications. He also knows what it’s like to be a caregiver, sandwiched between two generations. That personal story is the subject of "Surviving the Sandwich Generation Years: How to Balance Caring for Parents While Raising Kids", one of twenty-two stories in the award-winni...

Imagine you open your computer, strike a few keys, and there’s your spouse…who died three years ago – like my husband did. You aren’t looking at a photo. Or a video. No. This is more like Zoom or Facetime. The image you see looks, acts, and moves just like your spouse. Sounds like your spouse, too. You stare in disbelief as the image smiles and says, “Honey, I’ve missed you.” What’s your gut reaction? An AI miracle? Or emotional whiplash? This past August, I received an email f...

The attachment bonds we formed in our earliest relationships influence how we connect with others later in life. Dementia care expert Tami Anastasia, MA, brings 30 years of experience in supporting family and professional caregivers. In this episode she talks about four attachment styles and how they can manifest when caring for someone with dementia.

You will never regret being kind to your spouse. In a strong marriage, the sexual expression of love is the sinew that ties two hearts together and forms the kind of bond we depend on to get us through life's greatest challenges. As we age, the intensity of physical passion burns more ember than flame, but the bonds of love can be just as strong, even stronger, than ever. Alzheimer's forces a wedge in the relationship. Caregiver stress is more devastating than you imagined. Frustration and An...

You know that caring for a loved one with Alzheimer's or other form of dementia can leave your mind confused, your body exhausted, and your spirit depressed. Yes, and what if I said there's something simple that might help you survive the caregiving journey? Yes, and what if I said this something is fun and free? I'm talking about improvisational theater, "improv" for short. Imagine a group of people on stage, making up a comedy skit as they go along. No experience required for what I'm suggesti...

Former governor of Wisconsin, Martin L. Schreiber ("Marty") married his high school sweetheart, Elaine. Sixty-two years later, she died from Alzheimer's Disease. To help other spouses on the same dementia caregiving journey, Marty wrote a memoir: My Two Elaines. In it, he says, “None of the books I read conveyed the ugly truth about caregiving: that it can destroy you – even kill you – if you go about it wrong.” Marty also wrote the memoir to help heal his own heart. Recounting his ignorance, frustration, and anger, Marty says he was not a very good caregiver. He talks about how having to ask for help challenged his sense of masculinity, something many men of his generation struggle with. He also talks about coping with alcohol, what he calls "the caregiver's poison," until his children intervened and made him see what he was doing to himself.

At part of their daughter's wedding ceremony, Heather was supposed to give their daughter a necklace that had once belonged to Heather's mother.  Heather's husband, John, talks about what it was like when he and his daughter realized Heather had...

For 13 years, John Scully visited his mom in a nursing home. For the last 8 years of her life, she couldn’t talk. So he had other conversations. And they became a book. It’s called Visited Mom Today: Conversations Through the Lens of...

I grew up listening to Walter Cronkite. He signed off each nightly newscast with “And that’s the way it is.” As a kid, I was often alarmed by the news. But I reasoned that if Walter Cronkite respected me enough to tell me the truth, then I could...

This episode is a message for the caregiver to send to someone else, someone who doesn't know, or doesn't understand, the stress the caregiver is going through. I liken that stress to driving alone, in an old car, up a steep mountain on a narrow,...

"Between now and dead, you've got a purpose. Don't be timid." Before she retired as a hospice chaplain, Reverend Victoria Burdick faced her own death several times. In her 30s while in divinity school, she wrote a series of essays she called "Lunch...

You've probably heard of anticipatory grief. Unbidden, hidden, and immediate, it comes with the diagnosis that your loved one has Alzheimer's. Depending on when the diagnosis was delivered, it can be several years or more before your loved one dies....

For a person with Alzheimer's or other form of dementia, wandering can be dangerous. If that person isn't found within 24 hours, the chances that he or she will suffer serious injury, even death, increase dramatically. The family dementia caregiver...

Your spouse has Alzheimer's. You know he - or she - shouldn't be driving. When you bring up the subject, you hear some version of, "That's ridiculous! I know how to drive a car."  He might be right. He might still know how to drive a car. The...

Mary Lou Falcone became a caregiver when her father had a massive stroke. She was 10 years old. The experience prepared her for the day, many years later, when her husband, illustrator and 1950s rocker Nicky Zann, was diagnosed with Lewy Body Dementia...

Sometimes, the dreams we carry inspire us. Then life changes, especially if your spouse has dementia. Now, those same dreams weigh us down… and we have to let go. Advertisements for some memory care facilities and some dementia service agencies...

This is a cautionary tale about a dear friend, a family caregiver who died first. She was in her mid-70s, a few weeks younger than I am. In mid-April, she had a stroke. She died mid-July, just as I faced the one-year milestone of my husband's death...

Questions and answers. Frustrations and fresh ideas. Support and compassion. They’re all elements of what a good support group can provide. There are differences in the various forms of dementia and differences in the patients. Still, when it comes to helping the caregiver navigate the journey with a spouse, there are plenty of similarities. It’s those similarities that make being in a support group so valuable. You can find a modified transcript of the episode here on the website.

My husband died last summer. He had Alzheimer's. I’ve experienced a lot of “firsts” without him: his birthday, my birthday, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, and most recently, Valentine’s Day. Some of those days passed without...

Not feeling festive? No surprise. For those of us caring for a spouse with Alzheimer's or other form of dementia, December can be a cruel month. While much of the world is joyful. We're sad. It's part of the journey we're on. Today is the Winter...

Are you caring for a spouse with Alzheimer's?  You need to know that hope, like optimism, can strengthen your resilience or distort your reality. Hope can also be the key to your surivival.  My husband died four months ago. In caring for...